take a peek

Look - at that little counter thing over there... Yes, the one that says TWENTY FOUR DAYS until Todd and Tara get married.

Did you get chest flitters then too? It kind of feels like a heart attack but I'm sure it's just anxiety.

Good golly, it's been so crazy. Reply cards are coming in by the half dozen a day. I've got vendor meetings, engagement sessions, crafts to finish, favors to stuff, 7 lbs to lose, and about 104 other things to do. I hate my to do list right now and they normally make me feel better but not the big one. I have to come up with $2600 in the next 23 days and I'm just really sick over it. Did you know that I'm throwing a very nice wedding for 200 people on an $8000 budget? Yeah, I know - impressive right? Catering, venue, music, alcohol, DJ, and rentals - all done on 8k. I'm proud, especially when I see those stupid shows on WE network and the girls are all "I don't know if I can throw my dream wedding for 50k".

Makes me wanna barf.

So, anyhow... Today is the first day of October, which means I can officially put out my pumpkin flavored candles and make stuff using pumpkin. I was going to share this super simple recipe I found on allrecipes.com that I'm taking to poker tonight since I don't have a lot of time to write exactly ALL of the stuff that's going on right now.

I took a mental health day yesterday. haha It just sounds funny.

Here's the recipe - I'll be back to write more in a couple of days.

PUMPKIN FLUFF DIP
1 - 16 oz. container of frozen whipped topping (I'm using sugar free Cool-Whip)
1 - 5 oz. package instant vanilla pudding (sugar free again)
1 -15 oz. can solid pack pumpkin (not pie filling, actual pumpkin)
1 tsp pumpkin pie spice

Mix the pudding, pumpkin, and pumpkin spice together in a large bow. Fold in the Cool-Whip and fridge. I'm serving mine with Granny Smith apples and graham cracker sticks. YUM!

Peace out til later this week...

i'm so good

Last night I kicked some kitchen ass! We had the piles (see photos below) of gifts from the shower and Monday night I got the lazies so nothing got cleaned up. Hubs took me for a delicious dinner of pizza, salad, and wine so I had a hard time keeping my eyes open once we got home. Tuesday was another day though and I had big plans! I hurried to the grocery store after work, grabbed the food I needed for the week's menu (yes, I make a weekly menu) and ran home. Our darling BFF was there, checking out the shower tornado, ready to hang out and drink some beer. Hubs and I put the groceries away and I made a really yummy fried chicken salad that was definitely restaurant quality. Watch out Applebees! BFF hung out for a couple of hours while Hubs and I unpacked the rest of the gifts and decided what we should garage sale. He was a doll and did a lot so I let him go chill and watch WSOP.

I jumped right in - I could not handle the mess anymore! Seriously, there was new silverware on the counter, old plates on the bar, new glasses and platters in the dishwasher - it was making me nuts! I took all of the old stuff out of the cabinets and put it on the desk. I moved all of the clean stuff to their new homes. I reloaded the dishwasher for round #3 of new kitchen gear to be cleaned. After about an hour I had everything in its new spot and our kitchen look clean and new. It was fab. It really looks like a new kitchen.

I'm so in love with everything we got, our plates, our gadgets, and especially the Keurig. Oh. My. I love my coffee machine. I let BFF make a cup for herself and she was in love with it too. Seriously, it takes about 15 seconds to have a fresh cup of perfectly brewed coffee. I'm still trying all of the flavors in the K-cup variety pack, so far I think I like Coffee People the best. You should seriously check these suckas out. They're beyond fantastic and I'm so glad that Rev Ben's mama got it for us. Gosh, reading over that I sound like an advertisement. They didn't have to pay me to say that, I just love the darn thing.

So, that's today so far. I'm about to head back to the grocery store shortly because I had already planned on grilling pork chops tonight but now I need smoked gouda, bacon, and parsley to stuff in the chops and then grill 'em up. Yum. Servin it up with some healthy home fries and garlicky green beans. No wonder he wants to marry me, right? haha

Oh, almost had a wedding meltdown yesterday. I called the linen rental place because I never recieved the invoice they were supposed to send me. They couldn't find it in the system and we had to start all over again. Thank goodness I know my shit because it would have sucked if I went to pick them up before the wedding and they wouldn't have it. Disaster averted. My invites went out Monday and people are already getting them! Toats exciting!!!

my life in photos right now

Three of my wonderful friends threw my bridal shower this weekend. I have NEVER been so overwhelmed with love. It was at a winery here in Tulsa and the owners were awesome. I had one snag before I got there - a little dress fiasco that made me 30 minutes late. Once I got there, had a glass of their delish muscat canneli and saw all of my friends and family, things were fine. I heard so many words of wisdom, things that make me tear up when I recall them now. The gifts we received were amazing and I am still in shock that people were that generous. I was completely surrounded by women who are so supportive and caring, and it truly was the best shower I've ever been to, thanks to my best friend. The food, the wine, and the people were awesome, it was absolutely perfect!

The wedding is - yep - you saw it, FORTY DAYS away. Invitations are going out today. Mr. Groom and his brother are going to get their tuxes today (otherwise I'm sending my mother after them!). We're going to get his ring this week. I've got all of my projects complete, invites are done, all rentals/vendors are taken care of, honeymoon is booked, I'm just waiting on something to catch me off guard. We've got engagement photos next week and I'm excited about them - they're going to be downtown in the evening. There are 800 things going on right now but I'm not jittery, emotional, or stressed. Things are swell. Much better than I imagined but we're still over a month out.

Peace out for now...

2 months from today...

I will be married.

I wish I could describe what happens in my head when I say that, it's like a comic book fight with words, but better.

Amazing actually.

We had a really great weekend. Friday night was spent mostly at home and ended at our BFF's house over several beers and a domestic dispute between the neighbors. That is always fun as long as no one gets hurt.

Saturday was an especially fun day. All of my girlfriends have been wanting to help me with something for the wedding. I had a designated craft day for all of us and we got a ton of stuff made. We did all of my centerpieces, table runners, my birdcage veil, the card box, and a few other crafts. My centerpieces turned out awesome! I'm having individual cakes at each table as the centerpiece and we had to make "stands" for them. I got the clever idea to take two grapevine wreaths and stack them. Todd and I made 100 teeny felt bows and four of them go on each stand. The girls wired them all together and glued the bows and plates on. They look so awesome! I really love the whole homemade, warm look we have going for the big day.

Saturday night was a doozy. We had a(nother) big poker party, this time for T's step-sister. We had 24 players and my baby won the whole thing! It was a nice party, until the tequilla came out and then things get fuzzy. All I know is that I woke up Sunday afternoon feeling like I had been run over. I was sick, sick, sick. Honestly, I have no idea how I played soccer two hours after I woke up, but I did. How's that for commitment? I was actually with it enough to take two awesome shots, one that was with my left foot and the other went in the keeper's face, hard. Shortly after my game, Toddles had a hockey game and they lost pretty bad. Oh! I didn't mention that last week he got a hat trick... He scored two shots and took an awesome penalty shot. I love watching him play. Anyhow, after all of that last night I made an awesome dinner and we watched the newest Harold and Kumar movie.

I'm recovered today but I slept too much yesterday. I think I'm going on two hours from last night. Ah well, second cup of coffee is on it's way down.

Nephew update before I forget. Little Wyatt was born on 8/20 at 2:55 - just in time for his Mimi, Aunt T, and Uncle Tyler to get there! He is beautiful and amazing and perfect. It is beyond awesome to watch my little brother as a father. He's a natural. When he gets down close to the baby and talks, Wyatt goes nuts because he knows Trev's voice. We are all so in love with him already! Last I heard, my friend was still waiting to have her little guy, her doctor isn't as nice as my SIL's.

Peace out and happy Monday!

for goodness sakes

It's August. Can you believe it? Just one year ago we were newly engaged and getting ready for Montana and Knoxville. We forgot to celebrate our 1-year of engagement. Oopsie!

Well, the lists are made and I think I'm ready for this weekend. I've got the diaper cakes made, Gram & Gramps present is here, I've got menus planned and helpers assigned. Today I have to get decorations, a new dress, and order balloons. I really hope everything turns out nice. I am going to attempt to make 6 quiches tonight. Hehe. I bet they don't get finished. I have to go get the kids a pack n' play. Can't forget that. Ah, I'm really not stressing about it. No one would notice anyway.

Have I told you that the wedding nightmares have started? They're stupid and annoying. I have had two dreams that T has left me at the altar. The first time he told me I was fat and I make everyone around me miserable and the second time he showed up in ugly clothes and told me he couldn't do it and walked away. I told him about them and he just looks at me like wtf is wrong with you. I'm sure it happens to every bride. I ain't every bride though, this caca needs to go away.

I've got phone calls to make and corsages to order so I better get back to it. Happy weekend!

couplehood

It's interesting. This moving in together thing that is.

odd
exciting
comfortable
scary
fun
annoying
cozy

A damn roller coaster, that's the best way to describe it. A girlfriend of mine asked me the other day "Did you guys get all moved in?" and I replied "Yes, finally". Her next words were "Are you still getting married?" and all I could do is laugh because I know why she asked. It's a learning experience, and Lord knows I wouldn't trade it, but it can test the strongest of couples.

After two weeks of it, I can honestly say that we're getting the hang of things. We have our routines, things we do together, things we do alone, and things we do for one another. We have learned to choose our battles and that sometimes it isn't about who's right or wrong. We have bought a vacuum cleaner instead of a Wii. We have agreed on pictures, furniture, and that we need a new trashcan. We've eaten dinner at the dining table more than once and we go to bed together every night.

We're definitely figuring it.

Toddles has been happy - he gets a home cooked dinner almost every night. I've made several things that have surprised him, I don't think he thought I was that good of a cook. I've made homemade mac & cheese, pulled pork, stuffed chicken, pork loin, killer quesadillas, and gravy that was pretty tasty. He got a little upset that I didn't want to cook last night. I was honestly too tired to cook and he tried to get me to anyway. Little stinker, he ended up with a delicious cheeseburger that topped anything I would've concocted.

I'm still elbow deep in planning what feels like a dozen events. Finally got the invites out for my brother's baby shower and my grandparent's 50th anniversary party. They're both next weekend and I've got to start working on menus. I ordered one gift and I'm making the other tomorrow morning while T plays golf.

After these are said and done, it's back into full swing on the wedding. It's 3 months from today. I had my first fitting two weeks ago and my dress is absofuckinglutely amazing. It almost made me cry. It fit almost perfect, my alterations are already finished, that's how few I had to have. I had to change my MOH's dress because she is too tan and it looked like she was naked in the burnt orange I had picked out. Brown is much more suitable and it will look neat because I will be the only person in the wedding party not wearing it. I'll glow up there. It's kind of cool because we have my shower scheduled, starting thinking about my bachelorette party, and all of the fun stuff. Now if the parents would get their shit together and start paying for the things they promised, I'd be a lot less stressed. We're getting our tickets to Mexico next week! That's all I care about anyway, my dress, my vows, and the honeymoon.

Eh, you want some Friday Fun? Why not... It's been awhile.
I picked the Feast because it's my favorite.

Appetizer

When was the last time you had your hair cut/trimmed? Eek! In December I think. I'm getting it cut today because it's way too long and I want it to grow back out before the wedding.

Soup

Name one thing you miss about being a child. Family vacations. My dad was my age when my parents divorced and he was left with three kids under the age of 8. He would throw us in the truck and take off to places we hadn't seen, somewhere we could learn, or experience things that made us curious. It made the three of us who we are today.

Salad

Pick one: butter, margarine, olive oil. Butter. Seriously, is anything else even an option? Alright, I'll admit to using the other two but if I had to pick...

Main Course

If you could learn another language, which one would you pick, and why? I want to be able to speak Spanish more fluently than I already do because I think it's importante for our future.

Dessert

Finish this sentence: In 5 years I expect to be… raising children. That's scary to say.

Have a good weekend, I'm going to enjoy this one - it's the only time I don't have 100 things scheduled for the next month.

maybe i'm just boring...

Nah... Have actually been a busy bee, that's what Summertime brings. That was the longest I've gone with blogging. Oopsie!

Hi anyone that's still checking for updates. I've had a ton of stuff going on... Where to start?

My honey is moving home. In 10 days. I absolutely cannot believe that the time I've been waiting for, 3 years in the making, is finally about to happen. He told his boss straight up yesterday, "I'm moving on the 20th, job or no job." Can you believe it?!?!?!?!! We're crossing our fingers that the final answer on him working from home is going to be positive today. It's unbelievable but true. We also have a backup plan if his current job falls through... A company he applied and interviewed for in February contacted him last week and there is a possibility that an opening has become available and they said he is a "viable candidate" for the position.

What else you ask? Since hubby-to-be is moving home and we've made it this long without living together, I've been looking at apartments for him. Now, I have no idea how we are going to be able to NOT stay together EVERY night until the wedding, but we're going to try. Yes, I am a good future-wife, I will continue to live with my in-laws until the wedding. ACK! I cannot believe I've agreed to this, and it is completely possible that I may change my mind in a month, but that's the plan for now.

Speaking of apartments... Do you know how much I hate them? I've gotten spoiled over the past 5 years. I had a huge 2400 sq ft house, then I moved into my super cute "finding Tara" house for 3 years, and now I'm living in my own "wing" at the in-laws. I look at apartments and I hate the dingy little things - the countertops, the carpet, the closets. They all pretty much suck but like T said, it's only temporary. I keep forgetting that we have a foosball table (not TaraTot approved) so we have to get a pretty good-sized 2 bedroom and the only ones we can really afford are old. Yuck.

I haven't told anyone this other super exciting news... I haven't smoked since Saturday night. My best friend's mom starts radiation for throat cancer (40 year smoker) and I am trying my damnedest to quit so I don't end up like her. I am too young and too beautiful to continue harming myself like that. And it's really not that great. I've done well so far, the cravings have been minimal, but I haven't gone out yet or done anything that would tempt me. I have actually made myself stay home because all of my friends smoke and it would be too easy to pick one up.

I found a really great support group for endometriosis and I have been dealing with a lot of girlie issues lately. Won't go into detail about that but let me tell you, have sympathy on anyone you know with endo. It's horrible and awful and painful, and you cannot understand it unless you have it. Ladies, it's not in your head. The one thing that makes us a woman can also make us more miserable than any other thing in the world. That's my two cents on that for today.

Are you ready for the wedding update? Four months and fifteen days. I think I'm going to put a counter up on the side, but when I see one, it really makes my hands sweat.

I'm still playing soccer, except our season has been screwed up with power outages and such. We have a double header this weekend, hopefully we'll kick some ass in our new league. I'm also still working out. I am up to 2 miles on the eliptical in 20 minutes, which is pretty damn amazing if you ask me. I tried it outside on the track behind the house and I still did 2 mi/20 mins but I couldn't run the whole thing, I thought I broke my lung. Just more inspiration to quit smoking. At first I could only 1.25 miles in 20 mins so I've already improved greatly. I look better now than I have in a long time. I curl 40 lbs, no problems and I can finally do a damn pushup. Boy style. Word up!

Okay, time for a celebratory luncheon for my long ass, 7 years of wonderfulness at this J O B that I love so much. Blah. New restaurant though - I'll let ya know how it is.

I'm going to be better about blogging, I promdiggityomise.

neglected bloggity blog

It's that time of year where every weekend fills up... And almost every week night too. And then I forget about TTEAL. So, what have I been up to you ask? I've been to a double-header baseball game, the lake to see my Mama, watched every show saved on the DVR, played soccer (injured at that), made the best waffles ever, and got tons of laundry done - all in 3 days. This week is just beginning too. Tonight I have another soccer game, tomorrow I have bunco, Wednesday is blank right now, Thursday I have a graduation to attend, Friday is blank, and Saturday I'm throwing a bday/poker party for one of the Roomies. I think I thrive on this stuff though. I'd be a very bored and lonely lady if I didn't have things to do.

Speaking of things, kind of... Okay, so no one warned me about the wedding nightmares. We're down to 5 months and 13 days. Yikes! Last night I dreamt that T decided the day before the wedding he didn't want to get married. And on top of that the rental place kept screwing things up, annnnnnnd he found a cute little blonde twit that he wanted to date. It was one of those awful dreams that I couldn't get out of either, like you wake up and go right back into it. Those suck something bad. And then they really ruin your day once you remember everything. I've got my catering taken care of, invitations are here and perfect, my dress should be in this week, and I just have to find a DJ that I like. I'm on the ball and feel really good about everything. It's just crazy how things are flying by but I'm really glad we didn't do this any faster because I wouldn't make it to the altar, they'd be checking me into the mental ward for obsessiveness.

I cooked a little this weekend and I realized how much I miss making dinner and baking. I really only get to cook the good stuff when The Roomies are gone. I don't like being in someone else's kitchen, ya know?

Everytime Toddles and I eat waffles I have to order a side of sausage, I have a bite of sausage with each bite of waffle. So I keep saying that I'm going to make my own waffles and put sausage in them. Oh. My. God. They were just as delightful as I expected. I browned some breakfast sausage and crumbled it up into small pieces. Then I added it to plain old Bisquick made for waffles and poured into the new waffle iron I went to 3 stores to find. I ended up eating 3* of them because they were so tasty. Shortly after that, I went into a hypoglycemic coma because of all the syrup. Totally worth it.

*3 little square Eggo sized waffles, not giant round ones, thanks Mike.

I also made pizza this weekend. I bought the dough because dough is a pain in the arse to make without my bread machine. I used Gorgonzola, roma tomatoes, and Kalamata olives. It was good, a little salty for me. I think I'll add some spinach to it tonight when I reheat it.



I almost forgot it was Menu Plan Monday... Ch-ch-check it out.

Breakfast: whole wheat English muffin and a poached egg.
Lunch: either leftovers or a spicy black bean patty and a frozen steamed veg pack.
Snack: Kashi bar or apple
Dinner
Monday: leftover pizza
Tuesday: bunco night - cheesy olive bread (thanks P Dub!)
Wednesday: spicy turkey empanadas
Thursday: pinto and cheddar patties, salad
Friday: whole grain penne with ground turkey and marinara
Saturday: snacky stuff - it's poker night
Sunday: lasagna - I've been craving it for 3 weeks and I want to make it for the fam

a little more uplifting... (and my 100th post)

Sorry about that last post. I was sad and mad and all kinds of other things. Anyway, happy 100th post to me!

It's St. Patrick's Day - normally one of my favorite days of the year but I'm not too excited about it today. Perhaps because it's Monday and I'm finally recovered from Saturday night and my honey won't be here to celebrate it with me. It will get better I'm sure. BFF and I are going out for some green beer tonight so it will liven up.

He finally got that dang interview! After 3 weeks and 9 phone calls he passed the phase I interview and they're moving onto phase II. I still have a good feeling about it because the guy is persistent, even if it's only at procrastinating.

We had a fab weekend. Mostly anyhow... Friday night I colored my hair, caught up on my shows, and slept, which was nice. T came in late and made me get up and go hang out with some friends and I was not happy about it but that's what you do when you love someone. We had big plans on Saturday but they got delayed because we never want to leave my room. When we finally did, we went to the car show and walked around for a few hours. I picked out a new dream car - the Lexus IS F. Holy crapballs that thing is amazing. It's only a mere 56K, T is going to work on getting that for me. I wish... We tried to win the powerball this weekend to offset the need for a car that expensive but I don't think it happened.

We really did pick out a new car for his mom at the car show. She's been looking for one for a bit and I hope she finally made her mind up to get a G35, which I would also take should someone want to buy me one. See, we've had this debate going on for a long time. His mom really doesn't stand up for herself when it comes to her opinion, even when it comes to buying cars. So, T's brother has been trying to get her to buy a Corvette for like a year because the little brat butt wants to "buy" it from her later. Toddles and I are looking out for her and realize that she works hard and deserves something more luxe, hence the push for the G, which she loves because of the sportiness and luxury. So then she has this new boyfriend who only buys Chevy vehicles and is messing up the mix, trying to get her into a Chevy car, which are complete pieces of dookie (Impala) and unreasonable (Vette). After the car show and long talks, I think she finally listened to the good son and is going for the G. Gosh, if she only realized we're really looking out for her.

Moving right along... We did the car show thing and worked up an appetite for the BBQ place we've been meaning to try out as one of the options for the wedding caterers. I think we decided against that particular one because they didn't have enough meat options. It was tasty, and some of the best hot links I've eaten but the chicken had bones and there was no turkey or pulled pork options. Gotsta have pulled pork when you're eating BBQ.

Sunday was a beautiful day and we went to soccer game after we recovered from the 3:30 a.m. party the night before. I watched my friend's baby fall on the bleachers and bust his teeth through his lip, poor guy. Baby mouths make a lot of blood, it's really kind of amazing. I was just happy he didn't lose a tooth. This one is seriously going to try to knock them all out before kindergarten - this is the second incident already and he's not even 2 yet. After we got the tyke cleaned up and his dad's team won the game we all got some take out for dinner and played with the kids until it was their bedtime.

Once again, I'm at work and Toddles is at the house, sleeping. It really sucks having to leave him when he's asleep but then he can't make me all sad and weepy. Hopefully he'll get up in time to take me to lunch before he hits the road.

7 months and 13 days until we get hitched. I've got lots to do on that this week. Florists, DJs, and passports, oh my!

Enjoy your St. Pat's day!

whoopsie

I forgot about my poor little blog. What can I say, I've been a busy girl...

Last weekend was an awesome weekend! I got to buy my super beautiful wedding dress, went to a hockey game, and went to an 80's party at a skating rink. It was one of the best weekends I've had in awhile! It was crazy busy and I didn't even get one nap in but it was totally worth it. I got to see both of my bubbies, my gparents, and visit with my long lost BFF. Awesome, awesome.

I'm finally well. Or so it feels for now. Almost every single person I know has had either bug #1 - the coughing, sneezing, can't breath thing or bug #2 - the poops and the pukes. I was lucky enough to get #1 but it's taking a long time to go away. I was afraid the Bossman was going to give us all bug #2 because he had a damn fever the other day and wouldn't go home. Nice, huh? Anyway, the good thing to come out of this is that I haven't been smoking like normal. I have gone like 8 of 11 days without smoking. I'm going to try to only smoke when I drink, we'll see how that goes. So far so good. But my Love is coming home tonight and that means he'll take me out, and I might just have to drink. Maybe.

My Vday turned out okay and it was actually kind of surprising, considering I'm really not a fan of the day. My sweets sent me a cute ecard first thing in the morning. I got some new slipper socks from Bosslady. I bought everyone breakfast (but the picky shits didn't eat it so I did today LOL). I went home and the Roomies and I made dinner. I made beer bread, roasted sweet potatoes, grilled avocado, and the sauteed mushrooms. Dad made the steaks. Momma P made the salad. It was a perfect dinner, especially once I found a bottle of Smoking Loon Pinot Noir in the pantry that I forgot I had bought. After dinner I found my pj's and settled in with my new lover, HD DVR, and some Lost. Oh, and I bought T a book that I'm sure he'll never read and that's too bad because it's great. It's called Well Groomed: A wedding planner for what's his name (and his bride). It's really funny and I hope T takes the time to at least browse through it, it's got great wedding advice for the guys.

BTW: Wedding date - 8 months, 10 days. I've got a lot going on with it right now. I've decided that we're having BBQ for our dinner, added a margarita machine (or two), and we rented a whole 'nother room for the reception. I've got to make an appointment with the florist for next week and we're going to try a new BBQ place this weekend that I've heard good things about. All of the parents are starting to chime in on their opinions and I'm none too fond of any of them. Weddings are a control freak's nightmare. That bridezilla is in all of us...

Here's my Friday Fun, from Friday's Feast.

Appetizer

Name one thing that is unique about you. I have a large dragonfly tattooed on my stomach.

Soup

Fill in the blank: My favorite salad dressing is honey mustard but I like ranch too.

Salad

What type of wood do you have for your home’s furnishings? We will be filling our home with dark, espresso colored wood. (Can't think of the name right now, and some of what I got isn't really wood, it's that fake shit).

Main Course

Who do you talk to most often on the phone? That would be my #1, Toddles.

Dessert

What level of responsibility do you have in your job? Mmm... I'm responsible for the money that comes in and that's a lot of responsibility.

Have a great weekend!!!

changes

It was a bittersweet weekend.

I turned in the keys to my "super cute little house" on Saturday. It's been a really odd experience. Three years ago I was completely heartbroken and looking for a new home. My then-boyfriend was cheating on me, after I had raised his precious children and made a home with him for two years. I was sad and sick and really pathetic. Then I found this awesome little house that was full of color and cheer and just what I needed to start a new chapter in my life. I left the asshole and started a new life for myself. I started becoming friends with my Toddles again. I did the things that I wanted to do, not what someone else expected me to do. I got healthy again. I got happy again. It was a big turning point in my life because I really thought it was over for awhile.

The past month has been another life-changing experience. I have cried and laughed and lifted more boxes than I have in forever. I moved "back home" with my future in-laws. I'm getting married in 10 months. I'm in love and really happy for the first time in a bit. I'm getting out of debt and making a good life for myself, again. It's makes the whole marriage thing seem more real now that I'm sacrificing and bettering things for someone else. I swore three years ago I would never do this again. I wasn't going to fall in love, I wasn't going to give anything up for anyone, and I certainly didn't think I'd be moving in with the 'rents and losing some of my independence. Things change though. People grow up, fall in love, and makes dreams together.
I'm going to have my very own little family of two next year and that makes me so incredibly happy. *insert super happy tears here*

I'll stop being mushy but it really has been crazy in my world lately.

Did anyone else notice that we just slipped into December and it's already the fourth day, with twenty-one days to go until Christmas? Yeah, I just did. I haven't done any shopping yet but I have made my crazy organized list and I'm ready to start. Oh, but wait - I don't have my bonus yet. Thanks Bossman, make us wait until the last minute. I actually am going to get started with what I can this week. Not paying rent has it's advantages.

Tonight I have my first appointment with one of the photographers we've chosen for the wedding. I really wish T was here to go with me but I can manage on my own. I seriously only have 8 free days to myself this month. That is nuts! I was trying to pick a day to go to OKC for some Christmas shopping and it's like, duuuuuh Tara - you really shouldn't do that. Check this out: 2 photog appointments this week, two Christmas parties this weekend, work dinner, bunco, poker, December birthday dinner, and an ornament party next week; girls' night and then a 3 day break. Then it's off to St. Louis for the Steelers/Rams game, come home 2 days later, Christmas with Mom, T's fam, my fam, and taaadaaa! It's Christmas! Then it's my birthday and I turn the awful 27 and next thing you know it's freakin 2008.

Hopefully I won't have another breakdown between now and then. Peace y'all.

wonderful

You know it's not a good start to the day when you can't sleep until the alarm goes off and you get to work and there's no coffee... It's gotten better already thanks to the receptionist's hubby. He loves us so much that he brought the two of us coffee. Yeah Gumdrops!

I had the greatest weekend!!! And I'm so excited to share it.

Friday afternoon was more wedding dress shopping. I think I found IT but I have to go back with my MOH and see if she feels it as much as I do. IT was fabuloso. IT was made for Tara. Love IT.

My dad, his g-friend, and Toddles showed up later that evening. I had plans to make this pasta from the Pioneer Woman. Would you believe that I went to three grocery stores trying to find f&^king basil and still didn't get some! I know I should have my own growing but sheesh, you would think that you could find freakin basil. So anyhow, I made the pasta, minus the basil and my dad brought a bottle of wine. We ate and drank and drank and played video poker. It was a wonderful night! Oh, I made an apple crisp with ice cream too. I'm goooood.

We got up Saturday morning and went to show dad and Y the lodge for the wedding. They both loved it! We went to the casino after that. My lucky ass father won $250 in 30 minutes. Turd. It was time for the fair shortly after that. You would think that since they tore down Bell's that there would be more parking but there wasn't. I finally found a spot to make my own row and we set off to find some yummy lunch. I knew I was having a corndog first and it was just what I was craving, Dad and Y got one too. We walked around and ate some more junk, I had fried pickles, T had a steak sammich and some roasted corn, and Dad had a gyro. After we were stuffed Dad wanted to walk by the newest extreme ride, the SkyScraper. Boy oh boy. Bad idea after fried anything. He talked me into riding it with him. It is 165 feet tall, has two sets of seats on the end of this giant pendulum looking thing and it spins you around in gigantic circles and pulls 4 g's. It was freakin awesome until we stopped at the top and it was swaying. You could feel the dirty carnies pulling on the harnesses of the next riders below us. It was a rush and I'm glad I did it. Totally effing rad. I'm sure it beats that stupid slingshot thingy too. After that we were all tuckered out so we headed home. We grilled some brats and potatoes for dinner, played poker with our friends, and hung out. It was a perfect day!

Sunday, Dad and Y headed out. He is heading back to Cali today. Sigh. But he'll be back for Turkey Day in what, 9 weeks or something. Shit. No even going there.

We had plans to go see T's mom and that side of the family. I protested but he made me go. I wanted to lie on the couch all day and watch football and eat queso. She made his favorite dinner and we all sat around and played with the niece and nephew and the guys played horseshoes. The kiddos are so dang cute! We hung out there all day and a storm rolled in, which we could see great because she lives about 20 minutes outside of town. Me, T, his mom, and her b-friend all went to Chili's for dinner. I love their silly chicken crisper things. I hate to admit it but I ate all of them last night and didn't touch my broccoli and had just a few of my fries. Mmmmm... fatso.

T stayed in town because I was being whiney. We went home and rubbed each other's feet and watched the end of football and talked. It was the second perfect day in a row! I'm so lucky! Now if I can get him to wake up and take me to lunch before he heads back to the Lou I think I could die. Not really but I'd be super happy.

Happy Monday. :)

i'm a bad quitter

So I didn't make it very long after my last post without a smoke. I think I went 4 days but as soon as I cracked my first beer on Friday night, it was all downhill from there. They tasted like poo but I had a few more anyway. I think we're both doing pretty well by cutting back, I'm down to about 3 a day. Toddles s-mom is on Chantix, she's smoked for 32 years and is doing great. Helps that she's in Hawaii on vaca...

It's Thursday already! Today I am going dress shopping for the first time!!! My mom, sis, and I are going after work to a boutique that's having a huge sale. Then it's sushi time baby! We're going to try Sushi Train, haven't had it yet. The menu looks great!

I chopped my hair again yesterday. It's this cute little pixie bob thingy and I'm so happy that I got the cajones to do it. New hair. New dress. New sushi. It's going to be a good day!

Plus! Oh yeah, there's a plus... My dad is home from Cali for a visit and he's coming up to see us tomorrow night. Super exciting since we haven't seen him since June and that was totally pre-engagement. Also the reason I'm going dress shopping tonight and tomorrow because if I find something he can get it for me. I'm such a daddy's girl! Anyway, we're hanging out tomorrow night, I'm thinking of making meatloaf and taters and homemade bread. Yummy! He's bringing wine since he lives in Wine Country for us to try for the wedding. (394 days by the way!)

The fair is in town starting today. We'll all go on Saturday and chow down on some kind of deep fried goodness and ride risky dirty carnie rides. I'll probably do the olives and pickles, and maybe a spiral spud. I love this time of year!!! And I'm glad Dad will be here since Toddles doesn't like the rides, he and dad's gfriend can chill while we have fun. Yeehaw!

That's what the hap is with me.

Holy smokes batman!

I'm trying to keep myself really busy right now because I am trying to quit smoking (sshh! no one knows) and I'm having a bad craving right now.

I was just peeking at the calendar and realized that September has already flown by.

402 days until our wedding. Holy shit. Two months have already gone by. That means I've got roughly 13 months to get this all figured out. Any good advice out there? I know I've got some readers that have done this before... In all reality, I think it's going to go a lot more smoothly than I expected. I have a dress appointment tomorrow. Tomorrow night I'm meeting with his 'rents to talk about getting the deposit made on the venue. My dad will be here next weekend and I'd like to take him with me to see the place and to meet with the photographer so we can get that deposit made. Big stuff first.
I ordered my first sample invitation and I've already decided that I will make my own. I cannot believe the prices of some of them! No wonder weddings cost $28K - if I spent $4 on each invite that's almost a grand alone. My notebook is filling up with centerpieces and bridesmaid gowns and cakes. It's all very exciting! I cannot believe I get to try on wedding dresses - FINALLY!

Okay, so - got that out of my system.

Did you know that Autumn is almost here? It's a wonderful 77* here today and I am lovin every second of it. I'm making cranberry pumpkin bread tonight just to make my house smell good. I'm cheating and using a boxed mix but it looks wonderful, as long as I don't screw it up too badly!

Wish me luck on the non-smoking thing! It's been 36 hours. Go me!

case of the... wednesdays?

It's been raining for a couple of days again. It's a nice break from the intense heat we've had lately. We had a decent weekend. The fiance and I were kind of "off", everyone goes through that stuff. I talked to my dad and he and his ladyfriend were "off" too. Maybe the moon was in a bad lunar phase or something. I've realized how quickly wedding planning can take over a girl's head. It's all I think about and the event is 14 months away. I've got to stop and enjoy being engaged for a few more months before I really have to jump in the planning. So this is the last I'm going to talk about "the wedding" this week. For Toddles' sake and my own...

Peace out, I'm off to take a nap. The bossman is letting us go early and it's poker night so I've got to squeeze some good rain sleeps in real quick.

hello hello

On my lunch break and wanted to jot a little note. Had a blast in Iowa at the races, got the shirt to prove it! I've never been so sweaty and dirty, it was fun and nasty all in one.

I think we set a wedding date - October 25, 2008!!!

This time tomorrow I will be en route to beautiful Montana...

I'll update with pics when I get back.

Boy oh boy!

I am recovering from a long and eventful weekend!

My weekend started early as I had to be in OKC for the rehearsal dinner on Thursday night for my brother’s wedding. Everything went smoothly and the wedding party and their families went to dinner afterwards. That night I wasn’t feeling too well so I doped myself up on a lovely cocktail of muscle relaxers and pain pills to ensure a much needed heavy sleep. I woke up 10 hours later feeling quite revived except for the back pain from hell that would not go away.

Friday was a lazy day, I got to spend time with my daddy, whom I hadn’t seen since December. I hate that he’s living in California but I know he’s doing it for a good reason so I have to let it go. I just miss him so much. We talked about me moving to the Lou and Trevor’s impending marriage, as well as Tyler and what’s going on in his life. Dad fully supports me moving to be with Toddles, which I think I needed, since he’s always been my #1 fan. He knows that T and I are destined to be together, it’s just time for us to grab the reins and do something for ourselves.

Saturday was insane in the membrane! The day started off with a hangover, always a nice way to wake up. Toddles and I grabbed some lunch and headed to the park where the wedding was going to be to help set up the reception hall and chairs for the ceremony. The day could not have been more perfect, according to every weather channel and internet source, it was supposed to rain all day but we lucked out and the sky was clear and bright blue. We helped the bride’s family get everything set up and I took off to set up the honeymooner’s room for the night but couldn’t find anywhere to park so I had to skip that idea. I-40 was completely locked up because of construction so it took me 40 minutes to make my way back to our hotel and get ready and make signs for the park. Thank goodness for valium because I was stressed - big time. When I got back to the room, T told me that I only had 35 minutes until we had to be back at the park for pictures. What did I do? Grab a beer and take a breath... It kept me cool. I got ready in no time and we looked pretty freakin hot if I don’t say so myself. We headed to the garden for pre-wedding family pictures and did the meet and greet with all of the relatives. Of course, by this time, it was 10 degrees hotter and the sun was shining with full force, and I had 3 layers of clothing on. 3 layers + sun = sweat factory. I’m sure we’re all shiny in the pics but oh well.

Oh, they’re so cute - here’s a pic from the reception...

The ceremony itself was beautiful. R’s dad was the minister and he did a really great job. I think he made everyone there cry. I teared up seeing my little brother standing at the altar, waiting on his bride. It was a really lovely ceremony, just enough giggles and lots of love beaming from every person who attended. It’s funny because I thought I would be next, I wasn’t, and I am totally okay with that. I know our turn is coming... The reception was short and sweet, they kept the ball rolling pretty fast. I think T&R were pretty excited when we presented them with their honeymoon to Puerto Vallarta, they are ready for a break after this whirlwind planning. Here’s a picture of them riding off as husband and wife, aren’t they cute?

A group of us got together after the reception and went dancing. Dad was being so goofy, I love it when he’s like that! His girlfriend was so excited that I got him out of the house, that’s what daddy’s girls do - beg and get our way. We all danced and drank and danced and got drunk. It was so much fun! I can only dance with a strong lead - and T and Dad are both great dance partners. T has to count for me and Dad just swings me the way I’m supposed to go. It’s pretty cool that I can go out with my dad, his lady, my maternal aunt, a handful of cousins from both sides of the family and we all can have such a good time. Not many blended families are that cool!

Sunday, needless to say, I was t-i-r-e-d. Both of us were. All of us were. Toddles got to have his first Del Rancho experience, which was the yummo grease that we all needed. They really should expand to the entire state. It’s BS that they’re all at least an hour away, but it’s also a good thing because I would probably weigh 300 lbs if there was one closer.

T and I came home and crashed out. We slept for almost 4 hours, as soon as our heads hit the pillows we were both in lala land. I was a bad girl and begged him to go to CiCi’s Pizza for dinner, it was one of those weird cravings that you know you shouldn'y cave in to but do anyway. It was totally worth it - 4 words - macaroni and cheese pizza. Do I even need to explain? Two of my favorite foods combined into one. Delish! It hurt though, we both said we were going to be careful and not overeat but it’s T&T, you might get bit if you get between us and some pizza. Haha! We watched Deja-Vu last night - or T did anyway - I fell asleep an hour into it, go figure.

My baby flew home this morning, I had to have him at the airport at 6freakin30 after both us were restless all night. I bet we slept a total of 3 hours combined, which is not enough for either of us to begin move any body parts at 5:45 a.m. I hated to see him go but I know we have a lot to look forward to soon. Lots of plans in the works! Lots! : )

Only 3 hours until I can go take a nap. Cannot. Wait.

Peace, love, and turtles!
T Tot